Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
1 Corinthians 13:4
Last week, I was going to get my horse and another one from the field.
There was a new horse with them and when he saw me, he started to get the other two worked up.
As they ran back and forth through the field, I got more and more impatient and angry.
Rather than stopping to think about it, I kept trying to catch them.
Finally I decided to herd them to a smaller pen.
Still the horses were worked up and running and I got angrier.
After secluding the two horses I was trying to catch, I went to grab my mare.
I was angry and she was worked up and scared.
And in that moment, looking back, I realized how much my pride got in the way.
Mad that I wasn’t able to catch her, I cornered her and walked towards her, expecting her to just stand there as I caught her.
She turned around and two kicked me before running away.
As I kneeled on the ground trying to catch my breathe from just getting the brunt end of two back feet to my legs,
I realized how easy it is to let our pride get in the way.
Rather than stopping to think for a moment and see the best way,
I continued in the way that I wanted to do things, thinking that it will work out because I knew what I was doing.
As I’ve limped around this past week, the bruises on my legs have reminded me of how easy it is to fall into pride.
It is far to easy and happens far to often that we become confident in our own ability and of what we think we know or have, rather than what the Lord is willing to offer us in that moment.
Because truthfully, we don’t have anything in and of ourselves to help us other than Jesus. Whether you believe in Jesus or not, the truth is we all have pride. We sometimes don’t want to ask for help, we don’t want to seem weak, we don’t want to seem as though we don’t know what we are doing and the list could go on.
For the most part it is as if we push God to the side, thinking that we don’t need Him, because we have ourself.
When in reality, we have nothing in and of ourselves. When we begin to look to ourselves, our hearts become harder and further away from the only One who can truly walk us through our trails, hardships and actually even our joyful moments.
I am coming to see that the more I depend on myself, the more impatient, angrier, anxious and selfish I become.
I speak without thinking and let the little things worry me, because I am no longer looking to the One who can overcome all the things I face. Rather I am trying to muster up my own strength and ability to make it through something I cannot face own my own, no matter if I think I can, if I try I would end up not doing it to the greatest ability that could happen if I ask God for help.
I look at the bruises on my legs and realize how impatient I have become with horses and people. How easy it is to become self-dependant when not looking to the author and perfector of our faith. Rather than going through that moment, realizing that in and of myself I cannot catch theses horses and that I truly needed to stop and seek the Lord, I would have saved myself from the pain of pride.
And that is when I realize how prideful I am.
I have started looking to myself for answers rather than walking with Him, and I challenge you to ask the Lord to check your heart. To reveal the areas of your life that you are holding onto pride and to help you through the Holy Spirit to let it go. For pride does nothing but bring our hearts further away from Him who can heal us, restore us and remind us that He is our Strength, our Rock and our Peace, apart from Him we have no good thing.
I have come to see that in and of myself I have nothing good, nothing worthy of praise or worth loving if I don’t have Jesus as the center of my heart. Because without walking with Him, I am prideful. I begin to focus more on myself than others and start trying to do things on my own rather than asking for help. I begin to say things I shouldn’t and look out for myself rather than loving others.
I am thankful that there is a God who loves us, even at our weakest points and longs to help us through them. I am thankful that He does not leave us in our filth and pride but calls us to Him to be restored and made whole. He loves you where you are and loves you enough to bring you to where He is, to be someone who walks humbly with Him.
There is nothing we hold onto other than Jesus that can bring us life, all else will only bring us down. I believe that He is able to make us whole, to remove all that is selfish and replace that with all that He is.
Your life matters and who you are matters-may you be a light to the world and no longer try to be someone who fits into this world but who is set apart by the blood of Jesus. Someone who knows there value in the eyes of the Father and doesn’t need to be someone in the eyes of man. For our worth and value is not how man see’s us but how God does. Pride comes from a place of wanting to be better, richer, smarter than others. It is a place of comparison and wanting more. Pride comes because we want to be above another, we fear not being known or accepted by others so we try to make ourselves seem better than we are. And without Jesus we have nothing to boast about, for without Him we are all lost, broken, hopeless and poor…no matter how much money you have in your bank account or the clothes you wear, without the King of Kings, we are poor. When we walk in pride we no longer walk in love. May we be content with what we have and who we are, being willing to lower ourselves so He may be exalted. Allowing ourselves to be seen as weak so He may be seen as our strength. I hope you come to see that life apart from God is never fulfilling but always striving after the wind. For even after I got kicked, I realized that it is all in vain if I am not walking with God.
For there is a cost of pride in our hearts and it is being far from God. It wears us down and makes us tired as we strive to attain things which do not satisfy us. As we continue to think that we have in and of ourselves everything we need, we lose sight that we truly don’t. When we are prideful, we forget that we cannot save ourselves. It is only through acknowledging that we need Jesus as Lord of our lives that we can live a life of freedom. For without Him all we do is temporal and our attitude will show it more and more. There is more to life than simply here and now and I have come to see that the more I look only to the challenges in front of me, I let the worries of the world consume me rather than acknowledging that although I cannot do it or overcome it, Jesus can through me. I also come to see that I have no need to worry, to be impatient, to be angry when I am walking humbly with the Lord, as I no longer run around trying to get things done in my own strength, but look to Him and rest in His. He waits for us to let go of what we think we have and grab a hold of Him. To acknowledge that we can’t do it and we need His saving grace. I thank Him for His grace that although we don’t deserve it, He loves us enough to offer it and to help restore that which is and was broken because of our pridefulness. He can restore relationships, He can restore our brokenness and He can save us from the hole we are in.
That is my prayer for us today and the rest of our lives that we would stop looking out just for ourselves and our own interest but look to Him who is able to save us. That He reveals the pride that is in our hearts and removes it far from us so we are able to walk humbly with Jesus we is the example of love. I pray that we continue to lower ourselves so that He may be exalted through our lives, that we become less so He can become greater. May all that people see is Jesus when they look at us and may we come to see that we have nothing good in and of ourselves other than Him.
“Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ”
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.